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Are You Another 'Guilty' Parent?

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Are you another 'guilty' parent?

Most parents will at one time or another ask themselves this question, "Where did I go wrong?"

The problem facing the parent could be caused by a 7 year old child. Or it could be caused by a 23 year son or daughter, who appear to have chosen a different lifestyle than you would accept.

Let us look at a problem facing the parent with a 7 year old child. The child is far behind with his/her reading skills. Why did you not take the time necessary to read a lot more with your child, so that he/she would progress 'normally'? You were too busy with many other demands on your time. So you skipped a lot of times, when you should have given extra time to your child's reading practice.

You feel guilty, because you think that you should have given more time to help your child.

Wait a minute! When you helped your child with reading you thought then that you did a good job. You were of the opinion that you had helped your child sufficiently to get on alright. Now you find out through the school that your child is a bit behind with reading.

There is still time to catch up, if the remedy is more practice with reading - which it probably is! So you spend more time with your child to catch up. Problem hopefully solved and no more any cause for feeling guilty.

However, it could also be that your child for some reason is slow to learn to read. Some reason beyond your control.
It could be a school method used, which your child does not grasp fully to benefit from it. It could just be that your child is slow to learn to read under any circumstances.

This is no crime! It will just take more time than you expected for your child to learn to read. Give your child all the encouragement you can, every step of the way!

I shall not go into the special difficulties for children who suffer from dyslexia, etc., which it is up to the school to deal with from an early age. Such children are fortunately a small minority and need specialist help in order to progress to the best of their ability.

As a parent you cannot expect your child to be a copy of you or your partner. Each child is an individual and we all have different abilities in different subjects.

If your child has a weak subject, some extra practice is in most cases the answer. So encourage your child to do a bit more practice.

Encouragement is the best help you can give your child!
Give praise whenever you have a chance. Always find something to praise. Any criticism will come afterwards, but in a pleasant and constructive way.
Are you another 'guilty' parent?

Most parents will at one time or another ask themselves this question, "Where did I go wrong?"

The problem facing the parent could be caused by a 7 year old child. Or it could be caused by a 23 year son or daughter, who appear to have chosen a different lifestyle than you would accept.

Let us look at a problem facing the parent with a 7 year old child. The child is far behind with his/her reading skills. Why did you not take the time necessary to read a lot more with your child, so that he/she would progress 'normally'? You were too busy with many other demands on your time. So you skipped a lot of times, when you should have given extra time to your child's reading practice.

You feel guilty, because you think that you should have given more time to help your child.

Wait a minute! When you helped your child with reading you thought then that you did a good job. You were of the opinion that you had helped your child sufficiently to get on alright. Now you find out through the school that your child is a bit behind with reading.

There is still time to catch up, if the remedy is more practice with reading - which it probably is! So you spend more time with your child to catch up. Problem hopefully solved and no more any cause for feeling guilty.

However, it could also be that your child for some reason is slow to learn to read. Some reason beyond your control.
It could be a school method used, which your child does not grasp fully to benefit from it. It could just be that your child is slow to learn to read under any circumstances.

This is no crime! It will just take more time than you expected for your child to learn to read. Give your child all the encouragement you can, every step of the way!

I shall not go into the special difficulties for children who suffer from dyslexia, etc., which it is up to the school to deal with from an early age. Such children are fortunately a small minority and need specialist help in order to progress to the best of their ability.

As a parent you cannot expect your child to be a copy of you or your partner. Each child is an individual and we all have different abilities in different subjects.

If your child has a weak subject, some extra practice is in most cases the answer. So encourage your child to do a bit more practice.

Encouragement is the best help you can give your child!
Give praise whenever you have a chance. Always find something to praise. Any criticism will come afterwards, but in a pleasant and constructive way.

It is incredible how often a problem can be solved by the parent, if the problem is faced as soon as possible. If you leave a problem and just hope it will disappear soon, you will end up with an even bigger problem!

Whatever the problem, always emphasize to your child that you want to help. You are not there to criticize and blame your child - you want to help! When your child really understands this, there will be progress beyond your hopes!

Credits: Carl Schyberg

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