Developing Responsible Children
Sam believes that his son, Edward, is developing a fine sense of responsibility. He's pleased that, without too much reminding, his nine-year-old keeps his room tidy and regularly helps with household chores.
But more importantly, Sam is happy that Edward understands that real responsibility goes beyond simply drying the dishes and taking out the garbage.
Edward is also learning that true responsibility involves caring for oneself, others and the environment.
As a parent there are a number of things you can do to help your own children develop into responsible human beings. One of the most effective approaches is to let your kids know that their actions can make a difference.
Yes, you can make a bed or a pie much faster than your four-year-old. But, if you always insist on doing those tasks yourself, your preschooler wont have the opportunity to experience a sense of accomplishment or to feel good about making a contribution.
Parents can also foster responsibility by showing
respect for what a child can do at any given point in his or her development. The wise parent will tell the four-year-old that she did a great job of measuring the flour for that pie, not criticize her for spilling ingredients on the counter.
Remember to challenge your child. As your child grows, he needs to know that his
parents recognize that he is changing and maturing. "My mother thinks I can't do anything but take out the garbage," complains 10 year-old Jason. "I'm old enough now to go to the supermarket on my bicycle or do laundry. Why won't she let me try?"
Ultimately, a child's sense of responsibility will reflect how responsible he feels others are toward him. If a young person feels lonely or frightened or that he's a failure, he'll have little energy left over to care for others.
On the other hand, a youngster who feels that the adults in his life work hard to understand his needs and help him develop his own unique gifts, will probably treat others in kind -- and in the process make the world a gentler, better place.
© Algoma Family Services