Halloween Questions
Question: Our kids are 3, 6 and 9. With Halloween coming up, we have several questions: When are kids old enough to go trick or treating alone? Can scary costumes be too upsetting for preschoolers? How can we get through this wild evening smoothly and safely?
Answer: Halloween, with its greediness, sugary treats and scary costumes, definitely poses some challenges to parents--challenges that vary with the age of the child. For very young children, who can't yet distinguish between real and make-believe, Halloween can be very scary. But they can get into the fun with simple face paint to make them a gentle character like a bunny, a kitten or a clown. It helps to involve them in deciding what to be, then let them watch the whole process in the mirror as they are transformed into their favorite pretend character. Then, when others come to your door in scary costumes, let your young child see who's behind the scary mask, saying, "See, this is our friend Lisa just pretending to be a monster." If the child is still scared, you might want to give him a hug and say it's OK to sit out this holiday.
Rather than having their kids go trick or treating, many parents prefer to organize costume parties with special games and treats, or take their children to a party planned by a community organization. But for those who do go trick or treating, parents and other experts suggest the following guidelines for a safe and fun holiday.
Children should be accompanied by an adult until they are about 9 or 10 years old. After that age, they should go in a group, deciding with parents where they will go and what time they will return.
Regardless of the children's ages, they should go only to homes of people they know.
Masks can obscure vision and lead to accidents, so makeup is a safer alternative. Oversize costumes can cause kids to trip, a danger especially when crossing the street.
Kids should carry flashlights so that they can see and be seen. (Candles are a fire hazard, especially with the wigs and flowing costumes that some kids wear.)
Children should know beforehand that they will only be allowed to keep treats that are in individually sealed packages. Many parents find it helpful to decide with their children ahead of time what the rules will be about how many treats the kids can eat at one time. As with so many child-rearing issues, careful planning and clear expectations up front can make Halloween a safer, more enjoyable time for all.
Editor's note: Dr. Martha Farrell Erickson, director of the University of Minnesota's Children, Youth and Family Consortium, invites your questions on child rearing for possible inclusion in this column. You may fax them to (612) 624-6369 or send them to Growing Concerns, University of Minnesota News Service, 6 Morrill Hall, 100 Church St. S.E., Minneapolis, MN 55455.
