Putting It All Together - Protecting Yourself

Whether you're at school, at home, or out and about, you have the right to be safe. You can take an active role in protecting yourself by being aware and knowing how and when to get help.

At Home

Many people feel the safest of all at home. But even at home, there are some important steps you can take to protect your safety.

Always know who is at the door before opening it. If you don't recognize the person, don't open the door. Ask repair people for an ID.

If you're home by yourself, don't advertise it. No one other than your parents needs to know you're alone.

If a stranger wants to use your phone or needs help in any way, offer to make the call yourself while they wait outside.

If there is an intruder in your home, leave immediately. Don't try to confront the person. Go to a neighbor's house and call the police.

Keep your doors and windows locked.

Keep emergency numbers for police, fire, and poison control handy.

In the Street

Staying safe on the street is a common concern for many of you.

It's important to remember two things: First, crimes happen everywhere from inner cities to rural areas. Second, there are things you can do to be safer no matter where you live. Check out the following tips:

*Always tell a parent or another adult where you'll be. If you're walking, let him or her know when you've reached your destination. If you're on your way home, let someone there know when to expect you.

*Be aware of your surroundings. If there aren't other people around, know the nearest location of a store, gas station, or other public place.

*Walk widely around parked cars, bushes, or other places where an attacker may hide.
*Avoid secluded areas when you're alone.
*Follow your intuition or "gut." If an area feels unsafe, leave.
*Carry some ID and money for a phone call. If you are threatened or need help, call 911.
*If someone is approaching on the street, make eye contact with him or her. If you hear someone behind you, turn around and let the person know that you're aware of their presence.
*Walk with a purpose. Act like you have some place to be and avoid looking meek.
*Carry a whistle or something else to make noise. If you need help, make as much noise as you can. Yell "NO!" loudly if you are being attacked. Don't be afraid to make a scene.
*Ignore people who say crude or mean things or yell something from a car.
*Consider carrying pepper spray with you if you must walk alone a lot. Discuss this option with your parents first.

At the Wheel

It's late, you're tired, and all you want to do is get in the car so you can go home. But what if the driver is drunk? The answer is simple - don't get into the car. Find another way home. Call your parents, call another friend, or just take a cab.

If the driver is drunk, it's going to be awhile before it is safe for them to drive. When in doubt, ask the driver to have someone else drive. If no one else is available, suggest taking a walk or getting a bite to eat to allow time for the driver to become sober before getting behind the wheel.

If the driver is a parent or another adult, it may be hard for you to say that you won't accept a ride. Don't be afraid to ask if the person has been drinking. They may be surprised or offended by the question, but it's your right to have a safe ride home. If your parent is the one who is driving drunk, talk to another adult you trust or contact Alateen, http://www.al-anon.org/alateen.html. If you absolutely can't avoid getting into the car with a driver who has been drinking, sit with your seat belt on in the middle of the back seat.

Some of the same advice applies to taking rides from a driver who is fatigued. Ask someone else to drive or suggest that the driver stop to rest before continuing.

You may also be driving with friends or family members who recently got their driver's licenses. Inexperienced drivers may be too willing to take risks on the road, or may be careless and unsafe. Take notice and don't be afraid to speak up for your safety or to find alternative transportation.

In School

School should be a place where we feel safe from harm. Many students attend schools that are very safe and comfortable places to learn. But there may be a time when you feel your safety is threatened - by violence, sexual harassment, or bullying and teasing. Remember, you have the right to feel safe and to be respected. If you ever feel afraid or threatened, tell a teacher, school counselor, parent, or other adult you can trust.

All of us have been reading and watching the headlines about violence in schools. Have you ever felt unsafe at school? Have you ever been afraid to go to school? If someone has threatened you, tell a parent or teacher immediately. Take a look through these links below for advice on how to protect yourself.

12 things you can do to stop school violence
http://www.ncpc.org/2schvio6.htm

How to start a school crime watch
http://www.ncpc.org/10ythcw.htm

Department of Education Safe and Drug-Free Schools Program
http://www.ed.gov/offices/OESE/SDFS/

National School Safety Center
http://www.nssc1.org/

Center for Prevention of School Violence
http://www.ncsu.edu/cpsv/

National Alliance for Safe Schools
http://www.safeschools.org/

National Education Association's Safe Schools Now
http://www.nea.org/issues/safescho/

Sexual Harassment
No one has the right to touch you or make unwanted advances or gestures of a sexual nature. This is called sexual harassment and can include:

* Pinching, grabbing, or patting on or near the breasts, buttocks, or crotch
* Unwanted staring and gestures that are sexually explicit
* Unwanted sexual comments about a person's body
* Unwanted requests or demands for sex
* Showing a person sexual pictures they don't want to see
* Calling a person sexual names

If you encounter any of these or other behaviors at school or elsewhere that make you feel uncomfortable, tell the person to stop immediately. If they do not stop, tell a parent, teacher, or school counselor. You have the right to be treated with respect. You are never to blame for the other person's behavior. Other important action steps you can take include:

Keeping a written record of what is happening and how it makes you feel. This can help you in the healing process.

If a friend confides in you, encouraging her to speak to an adult. Don't ignore or tease her, this only contributes to the problem.
Trying to avoid situations in which you are alone with the person who is harassing you.
Another serious form of sexual harassment is when a boy pressures a girl to have sex, kiss, or engage in any other type of unwanted touching. You always have the right to say no. Forcing a person to have sex against their will is rape, even if you know the person well.

Domestic Violence

Domestic violence, meaning violence in the home or among family members, is unfortunately a reality for some of you. Threats of violence, actual violence, or bad arguments can make you feel unsafe and vulnerable in your own home.

If this happens in your home, you may feel embarrassed or feel that you are to blame. This is absolutely not true. You are never to blame for anyone who hits you or hurts you in any way. Violence can never be justified.

If there is violence in your home, help is available. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE or 1-800-787-3224.