Recruiting Families for Teens

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"A Family Is No Where" or "A Family Is Now Here." This statement may be viewed as a family is "now here" in every teen's life, or that a family is "no where" for a teen. How this is read is largely a matter of personal choice. Whatever is in an individual recruiterís mind is really the only thing that matters. If someone really truly believes that a family is available for each and every teen who needs one, a family can be found. The attitude of the person who has the responsibility for finding a home for teens and pre-teens must be that a family can be found for a teen and is therefore "now here."

Once the person who is responsible for recruiting families for teens believes that there are families out there for teens, most of the recruitment is done. You Gotta Believe! is based on the philosophy that the work of recruiting homes for teens and pre-teens canít be accomplished without first believing that it can be done.

There is no question that many families are out there for any given teen; the only question is "where is just one of those families?" An answer to this question, more often than not, is that a family can be found right in the life cycle of the teen whom one is recruiting for. Involving teens in the process of finding their forever family helps to give them a sense of ownership in this process, and then teens can team up with their recruiter. All children in foster care have attachments. Recruiters are responsible for identifying and reaching out to those attachments in a childís life and exploring with these persons the possibility of learning what it might be like to parent the child on a long-term, permanent basis.

The question then becomes, "Who are these attachments?" Consider the following list:

*relatives;

*unexplored relatives including, paternal
relatives and distant relatives;

*the childís social worker;

*the childís child care workers;

*the childís therapist(s);

*volunteers at the facility where the child lives

*administrative facility staff;

*support facility staff;

*chaplains or clergy;

*school teachers;

*school aides;

*other school personnel;

*child's guardian ad litem or CASA worker;

*former foster parents; and

*coaches.

All of these people have had interactions with
teens and may have made an impact on them in some way, at some point in their life.

Also, consider people who might not be close to the teen, but whom they may have met or know a little:

*foster parents' neighbors;

*foster parents' relatives and friends;

*members of foster parents' churches; and

*parents of school friends.

These lists can go on and on. The teen can help
create a list and add more people to it. There are dozens of people in a teenís life circle who have some attachment to the teen, who have a relationship with the teen, and who may be able to open their heart and provide a home. You Gotta Believe! has made adoptive placements with all of the resources mentioned above. A lot of this success is attributed to keeping an open mind and continuing to believe in what Henry Ford once said:

If you think you can, you can! If you think you can't, you can't. You are always right!

The next step after identifying resource families is approaching people who already are or have been a part of the teen's life. Simply asking each of these families if they would like to adopt the teen would invariably lead to "no" as the response.

To ensure that the response will be more positive or "yes," a person or family that has been identified as being a part of the teenís life circle needs to be approached with information about adoption and foster care. Consider what they might or might not know about the process.

They might not know that:

*the teen needs a permanent family;

*they are eligible to adopt or foster;

*there are subsidies available to help with the
expenses of making a child a permanent addition
to their family;

*there are pre-placement learning and preparation
opportunities; or

*post-placement support is available.

Once a family has been given this information,
they can begin to discuss several options:

*Would they consider attending an orientation to get more information about adoption or fostering?

*Would they consider becoming involved in the teen's life as a mentor?

*Do they know another family that might be appropriate for this teen?

Once resource families have information, they can better make informed choices about the level of involvement in the teenís life that might be appropriate for them both now and in the future.

Gwendolyn Townsend of One Church, One Child in the state of Washington believes that "everyone can do something." Not everyone can adopt a child, but a person may be able to become licensed to provide respite care or foster care, or recruit potential families in their own churches, schools, and communities. With this philosophy, all of the people identified as important in a teenís life are potential resources for support.

You Gotta Believe! has found that about half of the people from a teenís life circle that they approach are willing to learn more about the adoption process. The ultimate goal is to encourage families to become involved as a support network for the teen. This involvement may eventually lead to a permanent home, but in any case, the individual or family will at least be "now here" in the teenís life.