The Explorer---Your Child from Age One to Two
By the end of the first year, many children have taken a few, if wobbly, steps and have produced sounds, a few which may sound like words. Almost all have developed definite personalities and parents begin to complain (often with a bit of pride) "my child now has a mind of his/her own!'
The child from one to two years of age has acquired enough skills to begin to be independent in many areas. By the second birthday he/she will be walking confidently and talking in short sentences. Growth slows to around seven pounds for the year as opposed to fourteen pounds the first year. He/she is no longer growing out of his/her clothes every few months.
Now the toddler is an "explorer" in almost all areas of functioning-developing new motor skills, improving communication through language and personality, testing parents in many ways. She often refuses to eat foods previously enjoyed, wants to break away from hand-holding while crossing the street, and may try to put a finger into an unplugged electric outlet. These actions are not because she/he is being naughty, but being curious, and are a sign of the need to begin become independent of a loved parent. Even so the parent needs to set definite limits on how far the child can go to protect him/her from serious injury.
The toddler does not realize crossing the street without help or putting a finger in the electric socket can be dangerous. His/her rational thought processes have not developed yet, even if a parent has talked to him earlier about such danger. He/she is beginning to understand the word "no" but her natural curiosity impels her to act anyway. This is not a time to punish him but is a time to remove the child from the danger and tell him very specifically what he did wrong; that it was dangerous and even though you love him he must not do it again. This is why children this age must NEVER be allowed to play outside in a yard alone unless surrounded by a fence with a locked gate or to play indoors in any room without protective caps and locks on electrical outlets and other dangerous items.
Even with such lessons the natural curiosity of a child this age will persist in his/her exploration. Since this is the norm for curious children, the role of parent and parent figures is to continue to educate over and over again until the child acquires rational judgment and learns "if I do this, that will happen" result in new offenses as well as repetitions of past ones.
Even with these "terrible twos" and what seems like willful behavior the "explorer" can provide great joy to those around her. She is expanding her motor and thinking abilities and though at times seems selfish in play, actually is learning to play with other children by the end of the second year. He will want to imitate what older persons are doing, sometimes even clinging to the person who is trying to keep the house clean or cook a meal. She will love having a short cuddle on someone's lap and she will want to have favorite stories retold or reread over and over again.
These delightful times will reduce, but not prevent, the need to rescue the child from dangerous or forbidden areas. Your discipline MUST be educational rather than punitive since it is the basis for self discipline. Family members should decide together what discipline lessons will be used (such as time-out). Decide what important lessons you want your child to learn and which ones will require the educational discipline measure. Consistency is the key to your response. Eventually your child will learn as he/she matures.
Parenting is difficult, but it can be pleasurable most of the time even in trying moments if parents have some understanding of the child's ability to learn and to love while going through the normal development stages.
Learning through reading and experience, about this "exploring" year can be very rewarding to parents and very beneficial to their children.
