The highest calling is 'Motherhood'
Mother vs. Mother

This is not about who is right or wrong. This is not about which issues I personally am advocating. This is about the war between us. Though we carry the same title as 'Mother' we are divided.

See anything familiar?

~ Breast feeding vs. Bottle feeding ~

"If you breast feed, then and only then, you will bond with your child."

"Look at that woman, she is actually breast feeding her baby in public! The nerve!"

"Gross, I didn't want my child attached to my boobs all day."

"Why would you bottle feed when you got breasts?"

"You bottle feed? You are so selfish!"

~ Circumcision ~

"I don't want my son not to look like his Father."

"Why does his penis look like that?"

"Why would you put your baby through that pain?"

"In the Bible it says...."

"He will be very angry at you when he is older!"

"Won't it get all dirty?"

~ Stay at Home vs. Working Moms ~

"Stay at home Moms do nothing all day."

"Working Moms keep working so they do not have to give up material things."

"If you loved your child, you would stay home with them!"

"You're selfish!"

"What, do you watch soaps all day?"

"Don't you feel bad putting him in day care all the time?"

"He is going to forget who you are!"

"So, you're a 'home maker'? That's a career?"

~ Vaccinations ~

"Do you want your baby to catch a disease and die?"

"Did you even research your choice?"

"I know Mary's baby died right after getting vaccines. They said it was S.I.D.S."

"Every child should be vaccinated, what kind of Mother are you?"

"I don't feel comfortable treating a baby that has not been vaccinated. Please find another Pediatrician."

~ Correction ~

"Spare the rod...."

"If you spank your child, you are abusing them!"

"Time-outs are the only way to go."

"Look at that child, that woman needs to give him a good spanking!"

"She obviously does not punish him."

~ Attachment Parenting ~

"You will make your child too clingy."

"You will not bond with your child unless they sleep with

"Wouldn't you feel badly if you rolled over on her during the night?"

"That whole thing is just weird to me!"

"Putting a child in it's own room is cruel."

"I couldn't stand breast feeding, sleeping with my child, and wearing them in a sling all the time, I would need a break!"

~ Single Parents ~

"Where is his Daddy?"

"Do they have the same Father?"

"Why didn't you just marry him?"

"I bet your Mother takes care of the baby, not you."

"Next time you will keep your legs closed, right?"

"Your child will hate you one day."

"Why didn't you just abort/place this child for adoption?"

"You're a Single Dad? Yeah, right!"

~ Adoptive Mothers ~

"Her baby is from some other country...."

"Your nothing but an Adoptress!"

"Do you have any 'real' children?"

"Once you adopt I just know you will get pregnant!"

"What about the 'real' Mother?"

"Aren't you afraid something will be 'wrong' with the child?"

"You are just another form of a baby-sitter."

"Why would you want to take another woman's baby?"

"Do you love your 'real' children more?"

~ Birthmothers ~

"How can anyone give her child away?"

"Just move on and forget!"

"You're not a Mother, just a incubator!"

"Why didn't you just abort? That would have been easier."

"Do you want him back?"

"Thank goodness they have your child!"

"You don't deserve the children you have, I hope you become infertile!"

"What changed in two years time so that you think you can raise your son?"

"If you loved her, you would have kept her."

"Safe sex isn't really safe is it?"

If I bottle feed my child, does that mean I do not want him healthy? If I am a Single Mother, does that mean I am not a good Mother?

If I am an Adoptive Mother, does that mean I am not 'real'? If I allow my child to sleep in the family bed, does that mean I want a needy child? If I wait to vaccinate my child, does that mean I do not care about his welfare?

If I choose not to circumcise my son, does that mean I do not care about his manhood? If I correct my child, does that mean I am abusive? If I am a teen, does that mean my Mother is raising my child?

If I choose to stay home with my child, does that make me lazy? If I go back to work, does that make me greedy? If I breast-feed my child, does that make me strange?

If I am a Father raising a child alone, does that mean I am clueless? If I placed a child for adoption, does that mean I do not love her? If I put my child to sleep in his crib, does that mean I do not want to be near him?

Remember: We walk along the same path called Motherhood, yet we do not walk in the same shoes.

© Skye Hardwick (c)2001

Credits: Skye Hardwick

Related Topics

Adoptive Mother

Single Parent