Answer: How well I remember those days! But there are steps you can take to make the mornings more manageable. The key is involving everyone in a little bit of advance planning. Here are a few steps that other families (including my own) have found helpful:
As part of the evening bedtime routine, work with each child to lay out clothes for the next morning and pack school supplies in a bag by the door. As you do this, it's a good time to chat about how the day went and what the next day's schedule is like, thinking about any special things the child might need for class or after-school activities. Then, when you're all organized for the morning, snuggle up for a bedtime story before saying goodnight.
In the morning, build in extra time so that you and your children don't feel so rushed. Although it's hard to get up earlier, an extra 15-30 minutes can alleviate a lot of stress and give you more energy in the long run.
Just as many families establish bedtime rituals, try creating morning rituals, too. For example, my daughter loved the special routine we created when she was young. I would make breakfast while she was still asleep, then would wake her up with a silly song we had made up together. Then we'd sit side by side in the upstairs den and eat our breakfast on a tray. After that cozy time together, she got ready for school quickly and cheerfully.
Dad and big brother, on the other hand, preferred to get ready for work and school on their own with very little interaction with anyone. Everyone's style is different, so experiment with what works best for your family members.
Taking a longer view, on Sunday evenings look ahead together at the week--maybe mapping out the week's activities on a big calendar. Make sure you've scheduled time for family togetherness, even just a Wednesday-evening pizza supper when everyone has a chance to tell about how his or her week is going. In a world where we too often become slaves to work and activities, it can be helpful to children and parents to see how the week looks and to be reassured that there will be some quiet times together.
Finally, as always, notice your children's good behavior. When children get up promptly and cheerfully, let them know how much you appreciate it. When they willingly lay out their clothes and pack their school things the evening before, remind them the next morning how nice it is that those jobs are already done. The morning routine can set the tone for the whole day, so when we put in a little energy up front, the payoff can be big.
Editor's note: Dr. Martha Farrell Erickson, director of the University of Minnesota's Children, Youth and Family Consortium, invites your questions on child rearing for possible inclusion in this column. You may fax them to (612) 624-6369 or send them to Growing Concerns, University of Minnesota News Service, 6 Morrill Hall, 100 Church St. S.E., Minneapolis, MN 55455.