To Join or Not to Join - What do Adoptive Parent Support Groups have to offer?

WHY DO I NEED A SUPPORT GROUP?

Even though adoption is a very normal, acceptable way to build a family, it still is not usual. Therefore, while-family and friends can offer a great deal of support, they may not fully understand the questions and concerns of adoptive parents. Adoptive parent groups provide a network of people who share similar experiences. They, too, have struggled with the decision to adopt, worked with strangers to find a child, readjusted their lives after placement, and dealt with the curiosity of strangers. Even though they may have traveled different paths to the point of adoption, and even though they may have adopted very different types of children, members of adoptive parent groups have one very important bond: they love and care for children who live with the painful fact that their birth parents could not or would not keep them. Helping children deal with this loss at different life stages adds a unique dimension to adoptive parenting. Adoptive parent groups offer a safe and supportive place to raise questions, express uncertainty, vent frustration, brag about successes, and rejoice in the growth and healing of children. An additional benefit is the opportunity for adopted children to meet one another. For children who may believe adoption has happened only to them, it can be very reassuring to meet other adoptees.

WHAT DO ADOPTIVE PARENT GROUPS DO?

Different groups may emphasize different activities. Most -- groups, however, offer one or more of the following:

Self-help discussion groups: informal discussions where adoptive and/or pre-adoptive parents can exchange experiences, concerns, problems, questions, and advice.

Educational sessions: more formal sessions focusing on topics of concern or interest to adoptive parents such as parenting skills, special education, and developmental delays.

Social activities: ways that members help others who are working on behalf of children and adoption. Examples include fund-raising, serving as resource families for home study classes, "adoption day" presentations, picnics, and holiday parties.

WHEN SHOULD I JOIN?

It is never too early! It is never too late! From the moment adoption becomes a possibility, throughout all phases. of preparation and placement, a group can offer information, support, and encouragement m dealing with a wide range of questions.