Treat Dad Like God This Father's Day
Two days prior - on Christmas morning - he was putting on his trousers, getting ready for church, when he slipped and fell, breaking his neck on the marble saddle separating the bedroom and bathroom.
I really lost both of my parents on that Christmas morning. Dad had been taking care of mom who was in a slow spiral downwards from Alzheimer's disease. She was already past the point where he should have been her full-time caretaker. My wife and I were forced to put her in a nursing home on the day he died.
They would have celebrated their 56th wedding anniversary this past May.
My parents were happily married. But dad had a 'second wife' on the side that everyone knew about - music.
He was an accomplished pianist, a music teacher in the New York City public school system, a private vocal coach and our church's organist and choir director.
I remember as a boy, hearing dad struggle at the keyboard for months, trying to master Maurice Ravel's Gaspard de la nuit. He told me that the third movement was so complicated even the composer himself had difficulty playing it.
Growing up in a home where the air was constantly filled with the strains of classical music undoubtedly fostered the desire to follow in my father's footsteps. So it's no surprise that I studied music and now play guitar, sing and direct a choir in my church.
A dad is enormously important in the lives of his children. He is a role model to whom little eyes are constantly turning for guidance. Most boys look at their father and want to grow up and be "just like daddy."
One of the biggest problems in society is the breakdown of the traditional two-parent family. A child who doesn't know his own father is like a rudderless ship lost at sea, tossed to and fro by the waves and unable to chart a course home.
But dads don't only have the responsibility to be earthly role models to their kids. Children get their impression of God primarily through the impression they have of their father.
If a dad is a demanding taskmaster who's never satisfied, then his kids will grow up thinking they'll never be able to please God, either. If dad's a slack disciplinarian his kids will think he's a pushover; then when they grow into adulthood, they'll think they can get away with anything without facing the eternal consequences of their actions. An absentee father fosters the image of a God who doesn't care or worse yet, is dead.
Charles Stanley pastors Atlanta's First Baptist Church. His popular radio and television program, "In Touch" appears throughout the U.S. as well as in many foreign countries. In his book, "How to Listen to God," he recounts a story of a young man who told him, "When I come before God to pray, I get the same withering feeling as when I talk to my father. It's as if I see my father when I talk to God."
Last year I attended a fundraiser for a crisis pregnancy center. After dinner that evening, a young woman shared her story of unwed motherhood. "My life was shattered," she said tearfully after learning she was pregnant. "How was I going to face my family, my friends, my church?"
Being distraught, she contemplated suicide. Finally, she told her parents. As she looked up at her father, expecting condemnation, she saw unconditional love in his face. "After that, I started looking at my heavenly father in a different light," she said.
Here was a dad who realized the awesome responsibility he had to his daughter to love her and be a godly example in her life. As they embraced, I am sure she felt his love and compassion. Their encounter that day was as if this young woman had looked God himself in the face.
The apostle Paul wrote, "Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged." On this Father's Day, that's especially good advice to all of us dads.
