When a Child's Pet Dies

You can help your child cope with the death of a beloved pet by following some simple guidelines:

* When a pet is seriously ill or aging, begin to prepare your child. Talk about the day Smokey won't be around anymore. Talk about how to say goodbye.

* Explain that pets don't live as long as human beings. Compare the expected life expectancies of dogs, cats, and pets such as hamsters.

* If you decide on euthanasia: Explain that the veterinarian is going to help your pet die gently so it won't have to feel any more pain.

* Don't say you're putting the animal to sleep. Children take this literally, and may become confused, afraid of sleep, or wait for the animal to return when it wakes up.

* Get some books from the library about losing a pet. By borrowing them instead of purchasing them, you can also point out that you have to return the book because your child is not alone - there are other children who have lost their pets too.

* Don't say the animal ran away from home. Again, your child may keep waiting for it to return.

* Help your child grieve. Allow them to cry, draw pictures, review snapshots of their pet, or have a memorial service. Don't rush their grieving by immediately buying a new animal. It can diminish the special relationship they had with their pet and encourage a pattern of avoiding sorrow by distracting themselves or buying things.