It is often difficult for adopted children to fall asleep at night, especially in the first few months of placement. This article will take a look at a few reason why bedtime is difficult for newly adopted children and will offer suggestions for improving the situation.

Anxiety over the new placement
A new room with a new bed, new sounds, new smells, and a whole lot of anxiety is what greets a newly adopted child at bedtime. No wonder she can't get to sleep. Whether the child is a baby or a teenager try to have as many familiar things in the bedroom as possible. That old torn doll or worn jean jacket might look nasty but it could be just the thing your child needs to help calm his anxiety. Snuggling or a quiet conversation as you put the child to bed can also help relax her. My eight-year-old daughter needed to be rocked in a rocking chair before bed the first few weeks in our home. Eight may seem old for this but the first few years of adoption are strewn with opportunities to fill holes left behind by earlier deprivation. My daughter quickly grew out of her need for rocking as she became more familiar with her new family and felt more at home.

While a younger child may need physical reassurance such as snuggling or rocking, an older child may need to talk through some of his anxieties. Though you don't want to force a confidence, it is important to offer quiet times for conversation during the day so that the child can bring up issues that may be bothering him. Reassure him that it is O.K. to have some reservations about his new home.

Nighttime fears
Fears at night may also be a problem for your child This can range from simple fear of the dark to more complicated issues if the child has bad memories associated with night time events. Night lights, soft background music, positioning yourself close to the child's bedroom so she knows where you are, and even lying down with her until she falls asleep can help conquer nighttime fears. Again, older adopted children may need the kind of reassurance you would normally associate with a younger child. The gentle love that is every child's right may not have been received by your child until she enters your home. She and you will be making up for lost time together.

Old habits
It is often hard to know what the bedtime situation was at earlier placements. One of my children was routinely woken up in the middle of the night to accompany his foster mother in the car while they dropped off the foster father at his night shift. This same child has the habit of waking himself up in the middle of the night so he could get some peace and quiet by himself that was not available during the day.

To counter bad sleep habits it is important to set up a regular bedtime routine that the child will gradually get used to and can begin to count on. This might include a warm bath or quiet reading with a parent before bed; singing a lullaby, saying prayers or talking about the day once the child is in bed. Slow transition into bedtime is important especially for a child who has trouble relaxing at night. Try to attend to your own needs of exercise and relaxation so that you are not at your wit's end by bedtime. I know this is easier said than done but it will be difficult for the child to relax and get to sleep if he sees that you are a ball of stress.

Response to Medicine
Medicines that treat chronic issues such as ADD/ADHD often include stimulants that can keep a child awake at night. Allergy and cold medications can contain stimulants as well. Check with your physician to see if any of the medications your child routinely takes might be the cause of wakefulness. You might be able to schedule medication earlier in the day so that the stimulant effect has worn off by bedtime.

Other things you might try:

Diet
A diet high in refined sugar and flour can contribute to fatigue during the day and sleeplessness at night. If your child has been used to this type of diet, try gradually switching to foods high in fiber (fresh fruit, vegetables, whole wheat bread products) and high in protein (cheese, peanut butter, yogurt, lean meat). It is possible to find whole wheat cookies, high fiber cereals, even protein shakes that are fairly low in sugar but that kids consider a treat. I ask my kids to plan their sugar. For instance, if we are out to dinner they can choose between having soda with dinner or having desert. When they get home from school they need to start snack time with water and a piece of fruit and then they can choose a snack like peanut butter crackers, whole wheat cookies or a yogurt. This combination generally keeps them full until dinner.

Exercise/Yoga
Regular exercise is a great help in reducing anxiety and helping everyone (kids and grownups) handle the stress of the day. While after-school sports can be a real workout, don't count on gym class to give kids the exercise they need. Taking the dog for a brisk walk, jumping on a mini trampoline, or taking a walk with mom can be fun ways to fit exercise in. Town leagues, local karate and dance classes can also provide wonderful ways to get exercise and have fun.

Some children can benefit from yoga or meditation techniques focused on relieving anxiety. The local YMCA or recreation center may offer yoga classes. Gaiam (1-877-989-6321 or www.livingarts.com) carries a line of meditation audio tapes as well as a series of yoga video tapes. Your local library or video store probably also offer relaxation tapes to rent.

Consult your pediatrician
If, after a few weeks, you've tried the suggestions above and are still not making any headway, you might consider consulting your pediatrician for other ideas and possibly a counseling reference. Many adopted children come to their new families with complex emotional issues that need a professional's help to sort through.

(kdkcnjn668@cs.com)