Lately I've noticed something startling. We have few little children. We appear to have babies and teens, nothing in between. There seems to be a deficit of little kids. Children between the ages of four and eleven do not seem to be well represented in the general population.

There are tons of babies. Everywhere you look, there are babies. Cute, tiny beings, all wrapped up in layers and layers of covering. Many of these little people are contentedly sucking away on bottles and pacifiers. Scores of proud parents are pushing them, carrying them, taking pictures of them, feeding them, and buying them toys. The condition appears to be epidemic.

Some parents, enjoying this time of babyhood so much that they keep little ones-babies longer than they should. They are not ready to give up that wondrous feeling that comes from being the most important person in someone's life. You are the babies' center of attraction. Who would want that to stop?

These parents prolong this baby stage by simply neglecting to remove the bottle or pacifier until they have a very large kid expecting one. Another way is to refuse to potty train them. The reasoning seems to be if they are in diapers, they are still babies. Changing a five- year- old is rather repulsive to most of us, but to each his own. Size seems no deterrent to keeping little ones babies, neither does age, for some, babyhood just seems to go on and on.

Now, just when you expect that stage of small children and toddlers to appear, another phenomenon takes place. Suddenly, these little people look all grown up. We dress them like small adults. They wear designer clothes just like big people. We costume them in sexy replicas of grown up clothes. We suddenly treat them like they are half- grown instead of like children. Even the toys and activities we pick for them have very adult themes.

We do not allow these small people time to be children. I am convinced they need to learn all that adult stuff, but they must not skip over childhood. There needs to be a growing process where they move up the ladder to each new level only after willingly giving up the last rung. Sometimes, we may need to guide and persuade a child to grow up faster, but most times we are pushing them to achieve maturity too quickly.

Kids need time to be silly and childlike. They need to learn the skills to prepare them to go to kindergarten when they are four or five, not college. There are kids who start school who have never learned the use of crayons, paint, scissors, or clay. Still, they may excel at computers and video games. These things are great teachers also, but we need to let them learn childlike things as children. Moving up to more complicated teaching tools that should happen in a child's life much later.

It is sad that fairy tales and children's stories are no longer read to some children. Parents believe these are too childish for their sophisticated kids. Playing make-believe and childish games is not encouraged; we would rather start them on the road to being world-class athletes. Exercising the body is wonderful, but kids often feel overwhelmed by the expectations of parents when they play sports. Games at home should be played first to teach fairness and co-operation. Everything is hi-tech and childhood is taking a beating.

When these kids should be just on the older edge of children, they suddenly are acting like adults. Pre-pubescent youth are dressing like adults and getting involved in what should be adult behavior.

We need to give kids additional time to enjoy each stage of childhood and its own appropriate activities before they enter the adult world. The value of toys and play cannot be overestimated. When it is skipped, we have teens that are not well adjusted. My many years of working with youth have convinced me of this fact.

Let's please let our children reach each stage at their own pace. Don't keep them babies forever, but let's not push them into being adults too fast. Put children in clothes appropriate for their age. Manufacturers will soon stop making children look like little adults, if we stop accepting and purchasing those clothes. Seeing your kids looking like adults may seem cute, but it won't when your three-year-old tries to smoke or your five-year-old strikes a sexy pose without even knowing why. Skills, necessary for becoming functional adults are important, just don't expect children to master them too early. Pick activities and playthings that are fun and age-appropriate.

Let them be babies, then toddlers, then little children. Give them the chance to grow to teenagers in their own good time. Don't hurry them; it goes fast enough.

Credits: Jo Ann Wentzel