Many adults, as well as teens, forget that we are part of a larger group in every thing we do. You may be pleased by your individuality, and that is a wonderful and important trait, but so is being able to cooperate and be part of a group. The first group most of us learn to be part of is our family unit. We must recognize that the whole reason for existing does not center on our own needs. Parents learn to put their kids first. Kids learn, eventually, that parents are in charge and need to he considered because they have more experience and expertise. If we are lucky, they also learn we have feelings and should be considered part of the group they live in.

Children are soon exposed to the need for cooperation as other boys and girls are brought into their circle of play. They must learn to share and to respect other's needs and desires. This is the beginning of cooperation. When the child enters school, cooperation is brought to new heights. Teachers guide children in ways to do things together as a group. They must all participate in games, each taking their turn. We see music bringing together several voices in one song, and the blackboard is used to cooperatively teach a lesson and solve a problem. The youngest school kids have a good grasp of cooperation. Why, then, does it seem to be lost as the child reaches the teen years?

This is the time of growth in individualism and the time when a teenager tries out adult roles. He sheds any restraints upon this procedure by rebelling against all authority and parental control. He starts to rely upon himself. These are all normal, and in many ways, desirable efforts to become an adult, but somehow at this point we often lose the cooperative spirit.

When we decide we need no one but ourselves, we start to develop a feeling toward others that is not very wholesome. The idea of joining forces with others to achieve something is not appealing. Somehow, we need to promote cooperative feelings in kids so they do not lose that skill when they are adults.

Getting kids involved in sports is a good way to keep that cooperative feeling going. Helping them to find committees, clubs, churches, and group activities where they are a part of the whole, as well as individuals, should go far in forming this skill. If teens lose the ability to he cooperative and work well with others, they will fail on the job, they will not obey the law, and they will have difficulty as part of a family and as parents themselves. Please help them learn the value of cooperation.

Credits: Jo Ann Wentzel