Containment
Containment is:The time out chair - For example: your child yells out continually, after 3 warnings you put him in the time out chair for one minute for each year of age.
Removing the child to a different location - For example: your child hit another child, if he does not respond well then you must move him to keep the other child safe.
Removing all items (that may be thrown or damaged) before a problem starts - For example: when your child gets mad they pick up the nearest item and throw it, so put everything that may be thrown away. This will avoid a lot of stress.
Design or rearrange your furnishings to eliminate problems that may cause the child to act out - For example: your child seems to get cramped, like "I need my own space". This child will do well if you make your living areas more roomy, it may mean removing a piece of furniture to another room. You will find that this type of child responds well to having more space. They get a better feel, and a better comfort level.
Finally, containment is the process of containing the problem and minimizing the problem at the loss of trying to teach the child. By refocusing our purpose we will find that we are putting less pressure for the child to perform. For example your 11 year old child has a temper tantrum (just like a 2 year old). Instead of turning this into a class lesson, just get him through it. Some children just need more time to out grow this behavior.
Where the consequences fall short containment does not. Containment is this, lock up or remove all opportunities to steal, even outside the home. This may be - simply watching them very carefully when you go shopping. This will keep them from stealing. If their desire to steal is very strong you will find that they are very fast. They can steal while your head is turned for only a few seconds, so watch carefully. This is really good for them. If they can go for a period without stealing (even though you are making this happen) then maybe this habit can be broken. Containment is also locking or keeping safe those items that are a temptation to them, and I mean everything! You should never leave your valuables unlocked or unattended if your child is a child who steals. If you get in the car and then realize you forgot something do not leave your pocketbook in the car. Don't forget to keep the glove box locked. Always put your valuables in the same place. Create new habits of living even when you are alone. Never leave the car keys unattended. Start to think like your foster child does, how could I steal this item?
Obviously you may say I do not want a child like this, but that is not the solution, we need to persevere. Fifty percent (my statistic) of these children will pick the right path in life. All of this talk on stealing is not meant to be a discouragement, but to show you how to look at a difficult situation with practical eyes. Go in with yours eyes open and do not give up the struggle. Come up with creative teaching times. Get across the point that it is always wrong to take things that don't belong to them. Use every possible opportunity to teach honesty. Be careful how you live and be an example. Also these children think that if they don't get caught then it's OK. They don't realize that they need a mind and heart change, a new set of principles to guide them. You may be that person to show them how to change their "old ways." Throughout this process maintain a positive attitude. Remember to say something to praise them, even if it is unrelated to the situation e.g. "You are a great basketball player!" Whatever you decide to say, make sure that it is true.
Credits: Jeffrey Silla
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